the 2nd round of resolutions... man... as last nite faded, i realised there are so many more to commit myself to. resolutions are not just to resolve into being a better being. but much more than that. to right the wrong and to make sure this year goes smoother than the previous...

looks like i am going to have a mother of all test for the days to come. it's as good as Armageddon. 1stly, i have to control my impulses and string up my purse tighter. well, it's too bad that i picked on a job that is unable to satisfy my insatiable urge to spend more than i have. it's too bad that i haven't learned how to adjust to what i have now. taking a pay cut so willingly never felt so bad till now. so... until i decided to leave and fly higher, i shall release my urge through other channels like maybe be kinder to horrible singaporeans...

clear all bad debts.... soon the bank's gon suffered a mother of all heart attacks... i promise to make my payments promptly and diligently. i will not be lazy just bcos that damn bank refused to make things easier by accepting online payments through other banks and i have to walk that damn path down to the bloody AXS machine. i shall think kind thoughts that uob just want me to exercise. i shall think kind thoughts... i shall think kind thoughts...

i shall be kind to those damn things at work i really don't like. hey i know my life interests a hell load of asses but seriously, try asking me than digging from my team mates.... the gold comes real from my mouth... so shoot me if you have but nooooo... not the back door way... i'm really sorry for your miserable existence and i know you're prayin every nite someone notices you... but really you need help...
i shall then again be kind to rubbish... i shall be kind... i shall.... try to be kind...

i will promise myself to stand up to B.W. whenever he is getting out of hand. i shall not be played like a fool at his pleasure seeking activities... i will continue to be nice. if he is nice. i will continue to be supportive. no matter how. i shall continue to be just myself. and please let me be and leave me at it! i will be kind to B.W. he is delusional and currently trying to admit himself to seek some help. like real serious help. and stopping playin with your hp and hanging up on me for the sake of doin so.. you're 1 hell weak crap! lol

i definitely swear to whomever i will still haizzzzz.... listen to my gfs' whinings... i will still try to be rational.... and try not to attack their misery harping boyfriends or whatever.... IPS... irritating piece of shit... wahahaha FWAH! so irritating ah!

no choice but have to face it, i'm exactly comin to twice the age i was 12 years back in like days in counting. i need to really take care of myself by being healthy... no choice exercise lor... since i decided to be chaste again... visual sexual creature but physically bonded to only myself... cannot touch ok! eat fruits... eat fruits.... i hate fruits but eat fruits....

i have to get my act together stop wasting my weekends bed ridden just bcos of that 1 nite of reclining with an IV tube hooked to that bottle with alcohol content... i have to get out... see the sun... though i hate it... see the people ... though i hate crowds... do some womanly thingy like shopping... OMG the crowds.... watch more movies... yep... visit the library... yep... pay my fine brought on my soul courtesy of my mother who just loves to owe that damn govt money.... and she tells me about paying my bills... i will definitely hook my time with friends...

though i am gon be re-virginised.... doesn't mean i can't date men... come... wine and dine me... just don't eat me... that sounds sooo....... ..... ......

spree dating is just so exciting.... pray i don't get confused and forget names, dates, venues and the person i'm meeting... that would be an oscar worthy memory....

can i lose the weight... i can no longer deny that those extras on me are not baby fat... never was... i was borned skinny.... mal-nournished, lack of nutrients, underfed and underweight... hell my mom better don't see this.... no i am not an abused child... i can no longer deny if this keeps up, liposuction is definitely in the agenda... no i am not relyin on those! and i cannot afford to have my boobies go sideways, upwards, downwards ... one day, they might decide to go to heaven earlier and explode on me... i cannot afford the prices bras are costing nowadays.... they are probably weighing like what? 5 kg each?

since i can't grow taller... i should indulge in good shoes and good artificial height... though the strongest women comes in compact sizes... i sure don't wanna get lost in the crowds lest my friends can't see me... still every night, i will dream that i am tall...

i think for now that's all i can think of... since there are couple more hours before the alcohol starts to flow... i am still sober... oh well... anyone lookin for a wife? i swear i cook, clean the house, wash your clothes even the dirty underwear, i will endure your snores and your farts, wipe your drool when you're asleep... make love once awhile to please... smile alot and give you the babies, the trophies of your manhood (is still working ... fine... for now...) and be nice to you ... just put that tiffany worth $27,500 on my finger, buy me a house or at least a comfortable pad with a dog and cat and a huge bed.. and walk in ward robe... love my mom... let her stay with us... must have a car... work real hard... at the office, not in some damn chick's &^$#@*$^.... and gimme me twin boys for our 1st born... i promise i will love you...

seriously that thought excites me...