i just came back from F1 not too long ago. the night lights shone against the dark sky line. the cars blazed across the grey tarmac. they looked like fireworks zooming around. plenty of people came to the office. kids running around and wild. my headache got worse with each lap completed on the course. my fever returned. as the roads are pounded hard by the fast driven machines, my throat burnt and hissed each time i take a swallow. i was tired with the walk to and fro office. too many people. it hurts to be in public. by the time i got onto the train with peggy, i wanted to throw up. although i have been out barely 3 hours, i am zapped and truly out of touch with this world. i am lucky i can hide under my blanket now. i took a video of the race unfortunately my fingers decided that it is an act against god's will and took it off my phone. it is a great sin.

i have always love this song after hearing melvina sang this during our KTV craze period. lots of stuff go through my head each time i put this on replay. for the audience who sees my lonely self.


Zhang Hui Mei - 我恨我爱你






Lyrics:

面帶微笑離開你懷裡
mai dai wei xiao li kai ni huai li
(Using) smiles to leave your embrace,
我聽天由命
wo ting tian you ming
I resign myself to fate.
最後一張王牌在手裡
zui hou yi zhang wang pai zai shou li
The last trump card is in my hand,
二選一的機率
er xuan yi de ji lu
a one out of two probability.
不能放縱愛你
bu neng fang zong ai ni
(I) cannot indulge into loving you,
就放過自己
jiu fang guo zi ji
(that will just mean) giving up myself.

愛情已經過了甜蜜期
ai qing yi jing guo le tian mi qi
Love had past it's honey mood period,
多說也是無益
duo shuo ye shi wu yi
it's not good to talk about it.
愛不愛我已經沒關係
ai bu ai wo yi jing mei guan xi
Loving me or not doesn't matter anymore,
一點小傷而已
yi dian xiao shang er yi
it just hurts a little.
你可以很放心
ni ke yi hen fang xin
You don't have to worry,
我不會為了留你
wo bu hui wei le liu ni
I won't
假裝可憐兮兮
jia zhuang ke lian xi xi
pretend to be pitiful to have you stay.

都怪我 太不爭氣
dou guai wo tai bu zheng qi
Just blame me being too disappointing.
我恨我愛你
wo hen wo ai ni
I hate that I love you.
Oh~ 我愛你
Oh~ wo ai ni
Oh~ I love you
只是因為你是你
zhi shi yin wei ni shi ni
just because you are you.
Oh~ 我恨你
Oh~ wo hen ni
Oh~ I hate you.
你有我看也看不清的小聰明
ni you wo kan ye kan bu qing de xiao cong ming
You have that little cleverness that I can hardly see.
你有我說也說不完的壞脾氣
ni you wo shuo ye shuo bu wan de huai pi qi
You have those bad tempers that I can endlessly talk about.
你有我數也數不盡你的…
ni you wo shu ye shu bu jin ni de
You have countless
新戀情
xin lian qing
new romances.

愛情已經過了甜蜜期
ai qing yi jing guo le tian mi qi
Love had past it's honey mood period,
多說也是無益
duo shuo ye shi wu yi
it's not good to talk about it.
愛不愛我已經沒關係
ai bu ai wo yi jing mei guan xi
Loving me or not doesn't matter anymore,
一點小傷而已
yi dian xiao shang er yi
it just hurts a little.
你可以很放心
ni ke yi hen fang xin
You don't have to worry,
我不會為了留你
wo bu hui wei le liu ni
I won't
假裝可憐兮兮
jia zhuang ke lian xi xi
pretend to be pitiful to have you stay.

都怪我 太不爭氣
dou guai wo tai bu zheng qi
Just blame me being too disappointing.
我恨我愛你
wo hen wo ai ni
I hate that I love you.
Oh~ 我愛你
Oh~ wo ai ni
Oh~ I love you
只是因為你是你
zhi shi yin wei ni shi ni
just because you are you.
Oh~ 我恨你
Oh~ wo hen ni
Oh~ I hate you.
你有我看也看不清的小聰明
ni you wo kan ye kan bu qing de xiao cong ming
You have that little cleverness that I can hardly see.
你有我說也說不完的壞脾氣
ni you wo shuo ye shuo bu wan de huai pi qi
You have those bad tempers that I can endlessly talk about.
你有我數也數不盡你的…
ni you wo shu ye shu bu jin ni de
You have countless
新戀情
xin lian qing
new romances.
沒關係...
mei guan xi..
I doesn't matter...

我有你拿也拿不走的舊回憶
wo you ni na ye na bu zou de jiu hui yi
There are old memories of you that I can't take away.
我可以一個人安靜的忘記你
wo ke yi yi ge ren an jing de wang ji ni
I can peacefully forget about you alone.
我恨你最後那一句 我愛你
wo hen ni zui hou na yi ju wo ai ni
I hate your last word, I love you.